Faith and Recovery

My problems began with abusive relationships and burying my immediate family, four family members, all within two years. One that hit me hardest was my brother who burned in a house fire and to this day I still think of him and wish I had just one more day. However, with the abusive relationships, it took the pleading of my precious children to make me take a step back and evaluate my life and see that something had to be done. I became depressed, stuck, lonesome, experienced feelings of worthlessness, had suicidal thoughts and intentions. But with the help of two youngest children, God and a couple of devoted friends I recovered the real me. Today I am still going strong and possess the desire to help those who have been in similar situations.

Even when you feel like you have no one, there is always someone out there. Even if you have those trust issues, there is still help waiting for you. Even when you think you have nowhere else to turn, you do. It just takes the recognition of the problem and the will and desire to do better for you, and your family if you have children/others involved.

I started with websites like NAMI to give me advice for my situation. I had issues trusting others so I refrained from talking much in fear that my domestic situation would become worse if I did.

I went to church one Sunday morning and during the sermon it seemed like everything the preacher said was relating to my reason for attending. It was a cry for help, I trusted God, and this is the main thing that pulled me through. After the service as I was leaving, the preacher asked me as I walked through the doors had I been saved and when I replied, for some reason, he asked if I minded stepping aside for a moment and talking with him. In explaining his unknown suspicion, I of course began to cry my eyes out because, at this point, I had no idea there was someone out there who cared what I was going through. He continued to explain what he felt like I was as a person and he was right, only he described the real me and at this point I wasn’t the real me. He gave me some literature and I took it home and read it all and my heart was so determined to do better.

So many light bulbs came on. I returned to Wednesday night service and spoke again with the preacher to thank him for everything he had done thus far and I shared a summary of my situation with him. He asked if he could share this with the congregation briefly and I agreed. Never once has this been brought back up but these people have continued to provide a solid base of support for me, they are so welcoming and understanding still. God can answer many questions in our lives no matter the situation or how bad it is but we have to believe and keep the faith.

There is always someone out there who is willing to help us with our problems and help us away from them if we are willing to do better for ourselves. Please don’t ever give up. Admitting that we need assistance never makes us less of a person. It simply means that we are the bigger person because we are willing to admit that we have a problem and we want better for ourselves and our children.